Films > Film Reviews

Suicide Squad

22/08/16

I try to go into movies with an open mind, but nothing about the promotional campaign for Suicide Squad made me think I was going to enjoy it. So imagine my surprise when I walked out of the cinema with a grin that would make the Joker jealous.
Now, don't get me wrong, this film is utter garbage from beginning to end. It's not just that you couldn't write this shit, it's just unbelievable that somebody has.

The threadbare plot sees a secret FBI task force of villainous meta-humans assembled to protect the world from a villainous meta-human that might show up one day. When the FBI inadvertently unleash an ancient evil upon the world, the team are sent in (3 days later) to sort it all out and save the day.

So let's meet the Suicide Squad. First there's Deadshot (Will Smith), a weapons expert hitman that has never missed a shot and loves his daughter. Then there's Harley Quinn (Margot Robbie), the psychotic girlfriend of the Joker and the only character I had heard of before going into this movie. Next is Diablo (Jay Hernandez), a Latino gangbanger, complete with full body tattoos and wife-beater (or should that be burner?) vest. Then Killer Croc (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje), half-man, half-crocodile that inexplicably looks like he skipped arms, legs and torso days just to concentrate on bulking up his massive head. Captain Boomerang (Jai Courtney) is a drunk Australian whose superpower is, you guessed it, throwing a boomerang.....sometimes, he mostly just uses knives. There's Enchantress (Cara Delevingne), a witch in a bikini that dances a solo merengue when she casts her spells. And the team is rounded off by Slipknot (Adam Beach), his superpower passed me by. In fact it was only after the film that I discovered his name was actually Slipknot and they weren't just taking the piss because he looked like a member of the heavy metal band of the same name. They are joined by a handful of good guys that walk the fine line between pointless and useless. And Margot Robbie's bottom which deserves a credit of its own due to having more screen time than most of the cast.

No plot spoilers here, this is an Outline review and we don't do spoilers, as much as I would LOVE to just list every scene and the problems with them. Having said that, I think you could know everything about this film and it still wouldn't ruin how hilariously idiotic the whole thing is. Besides, writer/director David Ayer has done everything within his power to spoil it from within anyway.

Special mention has to go to the soundtrack. Every song comes crashing in with all the subtlety of a baseball bat to the face. From Spirit In The Sky as helicopters fly through the city, to the "swing batta batta batta batta batta swing" line from K7's Come Baby Come as Harley takes people out with her baseball bat. It feels like an episode of Homes Under The Hammer with a bigger budget and none of Martin, Lucy or Dion's charm.

So, amazingly, I would recommend Suicide Squad. It's not nasty or hateful, which is what I was expecting. It's just completely nonsensical. I laughed out loud almost all the way through it, just not at the bits I was supposed to. There are a lot of 'so bad they're good' films out there (Troll 2, Demonic Toys & El Chupacabra being some personal favourites) I've just never seen one that cost $175 million before.

Oh, and make sure you stick around for the post-credits sequence that renders the ENTIRE FILM pointless. Pure gold!